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Cowboys & Aliens (PG-13)

August 1, 2011

Thanks for coming to the D-Dan reviews. Today I’ll be doing a review on Cowboys & Aliens. This movie was not good. I don’t want to be mean but don’t waste your time. Cowboys & Aliens had so many flaws. I was so disappointed.

Where do I begin, okay so, I thought this movie started out great. Daniel Craig is such a great actor. He played his role the best he could. Then in the next scene they introduced the aliens. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think you should ever introduce aliens in an alien movie that early. To me, it just seemed like they rushed everything. So after a while the movie carried on then fell completely apart. The main reason why was the detail. They left us hanging so badly it’s like they didn’t care. Also it’s not like they left us hanging just at the end but it was all during the movie too.

The aliens are just snatching people just to kill some people then do whatever to the others. And they don’t even tell why or have a purpose for snatching them up! It was so bad, things things just did not make any sense to. Like how bullets couldn’t kill the aliens, but a no good spear can go right through the aliens body. They didn’t let us what the time periods where in the movie. For example, they didn’t let us know how long the aliens were on earth. The good thing was that they let us know why they where on earth. But it didn’t involve killing everyone.

The movie was really bad a poorly done. I like the story, but they did not play it right at all. I expected a lot more from this movie. So to summarize everything the movie was good because of acting from Daniel Craig and a few other characters, but bad because of so much lost detail, somethings didn’t make sense, and because the story wasn’t played right. It really seemed like they did not care at all. So I’ll have to rate this movie a “Pop Rocks”. Until next time, this is The D-Dan Reviews


click here for full review

13 Comments leave one →
  1. Lane Douglas permalink
    August 2, 2011 12:22 pm

    Love the review!

    Now for my comments…

    1. I completely respect your point of view, D-Dan. And I will graciously allow that your father’s opinions did not influence you, although I will not see a movie with him again.

    2. They actually did say in the movie why the aliens were snatching people up. They were “testing them to learn about human weaknesses.”

    3. We learned in the movie when the young boy was fighting the alien with the knife that the alien’s “heart” was in the center of it’s body. Thus, given that the aliens ran on all fours, shooting at their hard exterior shell was ineffective. But thrusting a spear through their center was able to kill them. Makes sense to me… Kind of like how in war movies people shoot rockets at tanks without effect… but then they stick a piece of dynamite (old school explosives) under the tank’s belly and blow it up.

    4. Would the information as to how long they had been on earth have affected the story line?

    So I offer my thoughts on your comments. Hope you like them.

    Way to go, again… on posting a review. I am looking forward to reading more.

    • August 4, 2011 10:28 am

      Thanks for the thoughts but there were so many other flaws that I could not explain them all. For example:

      1. In the movie the scene where the Apaches were talking with Daniel Craig and the others, The Apaches only understood English then but throughout the rest of the movie they could not.

      2. is it just me or does it seem like the little boy was not needed.

      3. I believe a time line was needed because at the end of the movie everybody seemed to get there memory back straight away. And I do remember the Alien lady say that it all happens to them differently.If so why was Daniel Craig the only one who took who knows how long for his memory to come back.

      4. The Alien lady said if you don’t think then the laser gun will come of but in the movie it clearly showed that the alien took of the gun then to place it down.

      5. speaking of that scene why did the alien take of his laser in the first place. He didn’t when he killed Daniel’s girlfriend or wife.

      6. another major flaw was that they never told us what the gold was for. They left us to start assuming.

      7.Also if the aliens were experimenting on the humans to find there weaknesses, they must have planned to attack. Again there is no reason to attack. They were doing just fine with the gold, no need to attack.

      Thanks for the feedback, but I just went to debate camp. so also thanks for letting me test my skill. good points you had there. thanks again.

  2. August 2, 2011 7:31 pm

    I heard so many mixed reviews about this movie. I’ll stick with your advice and save my money. Thanks D-Dan!

  3. Lane Douglas permalink
    August 4, 2011 12:28 pm


    I was going to take it easy on you until you threw that “debate camp” in there. So game-on my friend… 😉

    1. I’m not certain, but I think you meant to say that the Apaches COULD NOT understand English at first but then they could later on? Not sure. But from what I saw, the movie was consistent. The girl had to translate around the camp fire and then the guy who was hoping to be Harrison Ford’s son had to translate later.

    2. The little boy was definitely needed. His role was to show that Harrison Ford was not the mean old man everyone thought he was. Offering the apple slice to him, and then giving him the knife showed his compassion. We then learn later that Ford’s character wasn’t mean, but detached… he had lost all his troops in the Battle of Antietam during the Civil War and so had chosen not to love anyone every again… but the little boy symbolized “innocence” and was able to penetrate Ford’s character.

    3. As to Daniel Craig’s memory issue… his memory loss was not because of the aliens, but because of the grief he suffered. He watched his wife tortured and then killed in front of him and knew that (A) he had caused it by his robbery of the gold and (B) could not help her when he was on the table. This is why his early visions of her were of her in a field laying down, and not of her on the alien’s surgery table. This is also why the alien girl so closely followed him… and kept telling him he simply needed to remember who he was and had to tell him “it was not your fault.” This is a VERY VERY common human response to tragedy where a person subconsciously blocks out incredible tragic issues as a defense mechanism.

    It is also a very powerful part of the story line (something your dad claimed did not exist)… the point was that he rescued her (when she got captured) and then she rescued him.

    4. The laser gun on the wrist isn’t that big of a deal for me. Sort of like how in Harry Potter I cannot explain why sometimes they have to say the spell (Wingardium leviosa!) and other times they do not. What I do know is that the reason she told him not to think was because the bracelet was attached to him by virtue of his anger towards the aliens… it only responded to his subconscious thoughts of harming the aliens based on his anger. What makes this cool is that the same was true in the Old West (the setting for the movie) of gunslingers. It was said that the fastest gunslingers were the ones who did it subconsciously. So the bracelet reacted to his anger….

    It was the core symbol of the movie…. once he let the anger go, the bracelet and his connection to the aliens “fell off.”

    5. Can’t answer it, other than to say that sometimes my wife takes off her wedding ring when she does cleaning or the dishes and sometimes she doesn’t.

    6. The GOLD!!! You have to get this to understand the parallelism in the movie! Harrison Ford was a cattle rustler who did it for the money… he cared absolutely nothing about people… only the gold. But then the story line pits him against himself, in effect. He comes up against aliens who “rustle people” for money (i.e. – gold) and torture people in the meantime. The contrast was brilliant! Remember the scene where Ford had the man tied between two horses and was torturing him to get him to explain where his cattle had gone? Well… that was to show he was no better than the aliens who tortured people to find out what they needed to get more gold. But then when his own son is taken… he has to face the reality of who he is!

    Incidentally… Jesus told a very similar story to get us to see that we are like Harrison Ford many times. (Matt. 18:21-35) Can you see the parallel?

    7. There WAS a reason to attack… because the humans were their competitors for the gold. Yes, they had found a way to mine it… but so had we! So we were their business competitors and it is common practice in business to run your competitor into the ground. (Not a good thing or ethical thing… but it happens!)

    Sooooo… how’s debate camp treating you?

    • August 4, 2011 3:58 pm

      Whatever you say Mr. Lane. BRING IT

    • August 4, 2011 4:27 pm

      Sorry Mr. Lane I did not see everything you wrote. But debate camp is treating me very nice. One thing they taught me was to make sure the other side had evidence. So all of what you said had no evidence, it was just assumptions. They never told us anything you just said in the movie. Now I am not saying you are wrong, because that could be where they were getting at, but my point is that they did not tell us enough detail and as they say in camp, “I simply have to prove my point that this is bad/good” Then we give our argument. Which is what I did. The movie was bad because they did not give us enough detail. So like I said, you could be right about everything, they just did not tell us what you just said. So yeah debate camp was nice.

  4. August 4, 2011 4:34 pm

    Okay, so what do you mean, You “will not see a movie with him again”? That’s a deep cut bro…

  5. Lane Douglas permalink
    August 4, 2011 4:38 pm


    My man! You’re doing great. Nice critical thinking. And you’re right… debate is about the art of making the other side prove their points and not let them put you on the defensive.

    That being said… 🙂

    Movies are about stories visually played out on screen. And stories… to your dad’s credit… are an art form, and art is always subjective. Two people can look at a piece of art in a museum and each see different things. Which makes debate difficult…

    So in taking on the role of a movie reviewer… you have assumed a HUGE job. You’re giving your opinion on the “bad/good” of art which means you will always have those who disagree. Keep solid on your convictions! You’re doing a great job.

    I will stay tuned for your next review…


    • August 4, 2011 4:58 pm

      Thanks Mr. Lane for the advice and knowledge. I will be keeping that with me. thanks for staying tuned

  6. August 6, 2011 12:56 pm

    Your review clarified everything I thought of the movie. Good thing I won’t see it:)

  7. August 6, 2011 12:57 pm

    I meant to say: You know the movie is science fiction right?

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